My Bleeding Heart

The next dates I cant remember exactly which one happened when.. but they were all around the same time. 


First there was the stoner, I don't need to hide his identity because I can't even remember his name. I met him at a party, he was a bit older then me, in a band, the usual story. The first time we met I was drunk & charming. Then second time around he fed me these delicious cookies at the party we were at. These cookies were amazing & I clearly had no idea what was in them until I was such a mess, after planning my wedding to him, yes to his face. I then proceeded to throw up on myself & thought by getting on the swing set out the back that would air off the puke. I never got invited back to those parties.. or heard from him again. I did have to get my mum to come pick me up though & basically carry me home.


Then there were the unemployed guys.. Luke*, Justin* & Joe*. Not to mention two were also single dads, with exes who had issues. It was like I had a magnet. I had a good job, I had a nice car, I'm a nice person but I was also very gullible with low self esteem. So hey if they liked me, I'd give it a go. Now I didn't date all these guys at the same time, I wouldn't even class it as dating, maybe more so "flings". But they had the following in common.. lying to me, using me, playing on my self esteem & coming from Mayfield or close by & wearing a lot of Adidas. Please note Mayfield guys are now blacklisted for these reasons.


Then there is the "I felt sorry for them" stage. This included dates with guys who had the following ailments. 


So there's the missing an arm guy.. a childhood accident. It was awkward to hug or high five & it didn't eventuate. 


There was the deaf guy, which was possibly a good thing for him due to my constant talking & the funny thing is I met this one when I was drunk which is when I'm at my loudest. He took a shining to me & I liked that he listened to me.. a little too well, sometimes he was so involved in listening he wouldn't even respond. He was studying too much & decided he'd focus on that, not girls. 


There was the was legally blind guy, his glasses were truthfully like coke bottles. No wonder he thought I was attractive. But his lack of driving ability meant I was always designated driver, not to mention his lack of sight had restricted his career options to , well , nothing. He did nothing. So I decided to move on to my next lost cause.


Unfortunately I don't have an extensive dating history with those of other ethnicities. There was only the one, he lived on the Central Coast. After two dates, he asked me to go to his place for tea. His mother came home early from work & I politely said "hello I'm Jannah, how are you", her response in broken English was something along the lines of "Ohhh isn't it nice Dane* is going out with a bigger girl for once". It just went downhill from there.


So I guess to an extent I have a bleeding heart, for a long time it didn't help that my self esteem was at an all time low & I wasn't exactly fussy. I learnt in time that needed to change, no one decent was actually going to pay any interest in me unless I had some confidence & felt worthy of their interest. I have always had high aspirations, I just settled for whatever was dished up... 


This is my last blog for a few days.. but soon to come will be the schnitty guy story & some other hilarious tales.